A dedication to James
Why won’t they hear me? Why won’t they see me? I am here, right in front of them. Yet everyday they walk and drive by me as if I don’t exist. Will today be any different? I pray it is.
Wow it sure is crisp out this morning. Winter has really set in. The birds seem like they have been up for hours. This place is a sanctuary, my sanctuary. Will they talk to me today? My hands and feet are cold; I think it might snow today. I wonder if I should cover my tent. Will this be the day they kick me out of my home? This is public land; I have every right to be here! I guess I should head towards the streets. It’s going to be a long cold walk, and I am not traveling anywhere to rest indoors. I wish I didn’t have to do this every day. Are people going to be good to me today? I am so hungry, I wish I could have and have a shower. Maybe just brush my teeth. I need to find a restroom. I sure hope the people at McDonald’s let me use the washroom this morning. Oh but it’s so far from here. I wonder what it feels like to wake up in your own place. To be warm and comfortable when you open your eyes. To have a soft bed beneath you instead of the cold hard ground. Will I ever have a chance to wake up, rub my eyes, stretch and walk to the bathroom all while staying in my underwear? Then go into the kitchen make a cup of coffee, maybe some toast? Can I have these things without having to be in the hospital? I hate that place! It’s a terrible place. They all think I am crazy. I am not crazy! In fact I think they are the ones who are crazy! I see the world and people the way God does. What is wrong with that? I love everyone who I come into contact with. They live miserable lives. All they see is anger and deceit. They are full of judgment and sadness, but when they see me talking to random people or talking to myself they think I am crazy. Me?! They lock me in there psych wards. For what? To hide me? To stop me? Do they not realize that without me they don’t exist and without them I don’t exist? Man am I hungry. How am I going to eat today? What if nobody gives me any money? Then what? What if the police stop me? What if they give me a ticket? What if they arrest me? Even worse what if they put me in the hospital again? I don’t want to be locked up with those nuts! What is wrong with me going up to cars at red lights and holding my hat out? I am not begging, being a nuisance or even rude. I am trying to help these people see who God is. I am trying to help them. I am trying to survive. I don’t understand why some of these people look at me the way they do. I am not a bum! I am a servant of the Lord! Some of them talk to me. Some of them actually listen to me. I think they may actually like me! Those people I remember. Those people I love. I have enough money for food! I am so grateful these people have showed me mercy and given me enough to eat and maybe smokes and a beer. I should start walking back to my sanctuary now. Maybe I should go to the bathroom before I head back. I hope they let me use the restroom again. I really want to wash my hands and face before I go to sleep. I wonder if it is going to be cold tonight? Will my sleeping bag be enough? What if it snows? How am I going to stay warm? I will lay my trust in the Lord and do it again tomorrow.
This is for a homeless man in our area. It is simply what I think he may be thinking through out each day. He is a very nice genuine man. Yes he has his issues, but who doesn’t? We are better off having had the opportunity to meet him and share in his fellowship! It was myself, my Bubby, Jason and Cathy. When we first met James he asked us if we would make him famous and put him on YouTube, we told him we would and we did. I don’t actually appear in the video you can just hear me laughing in the back ground, I think all you see of me is my arm. =-/ God bless you James!