Category Archives: Poetry

I don’t know if I would call what I do poetry, maybe subconscious ramblings. A friend once said they were lyrics but who even knows! God bless enjoy!

Then and Now

Day dreams
To lost dreams
Animated screams
To muffled screams
Climbing trees
To building family trees
Dodging bee’s
To fighting B’s
Worst of rivalries
To best of buddies
Childhood fears
To adult fears
Adolescent chocolate milk root beers
To adult whiskey’s and beers
Childhood woes
To adult foes

To a life lost as sea
Wondering who you’d be
To I just have to let it be
Give those to me’s
To what are those fee’s
Scrapped knees
To a sinner on his knees
A simple bloody nose
To troubles no one knows
Cutting so deep
To what did you reap?


Posted by on May 22, 2016 in Poetry


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Ten months gone

Ten months gone
Everything feels so wrong
You are gone
Our family is gone
My life is gone
I am gone

Everything is wrong
You were wrong
Our family is wrong
My life is wrong
I am wrong

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Posted by on December 26, 2015 in Poetry


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My dear big brother….

This says it far better then I ever could…..AUTHOR UNKNOWN

From day one all we did was fight,
now all I do is fight back my tears.
I wanted to do everything you did,
because I wanted to be just like you.
Now I sit here wondering what to do,
because there’s no one to replace you.

I never did tell you all the things I felt,
like how much I really did love you.
I wish we could go back and start over again.
I don’t want to be alone. I need my brother,
I need my best friend.

When you think of me
while you’re up in heaven,
Think of how much you meant to me.

It’s sad that you left
without saying goodbye,
But just remember we all love you
as you began to fly.

You did so much for me,
as I didn’t do much for you.
I hope you will forgive me,
for all the things I didn’t do

You were my brother
and my best friend.
I will always love you
no matter how long its been,
since your life came to an end.

forever you will be my best friend,  brother and one above watching me while I stay here protecting those close to us in God’s name.

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Posted by on December 6, 2015 in Poetry


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You make me doubt my place with the Lord
You make me doubt He could love me
You stop me with doubt from doing that in which I am called

You give me such fear of my salvation
You make me fear the Lords wrath
You cause me fear and stop me in my tracks

You cause me to be ashamed of who I am
You cause me to feel shame in my actions
You cause me to be ashamed to call myself a Christian


You can’t take the love of my Lord
You can’t change the way He loves me
You can’t change that He loves me the way He made me

He gives me strength in all I do
He carries me through all
He gives me the ability to be who I am

He grants me courage to stand without you
He gives me courage to face my fears
He gives me courage to be who I am

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Posted by on July 19, 2015 in Poetry


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In your eyes

I see him, in your strong eyes
I seen you, in his captivating eyes

Their colours change as moods fade
The seasons change as the sun fades

A fathers eyes knows no lies
They seen right through his great disguise

When a life fades
It makes people change

To ash and dust
You’ve don’t what you must

Like Job you cussed and fussed
Like Job never did you lose your trust

Adapt and grow
You just never know

A day of cheers turned into to tears
With the realization a fathers worst fears

You stood up tall
You showed us all

There is hope in our tears
Even peace behind our fears

I see him, in your strong eyes
I seen you, in his captivating eyes

Never alone
Fear not he’s still got his stone
Thank you! You’ve truly set the tone

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Posted by on July 9, 2015 in Poetry


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They can’t do this on their own.
So what if you feel alone?
You’d better hurry up and answer your phone!
Smarten up, watch your tone!
Stand up and be a good little drone!
Don’t you dare let them hear you moan!
Smarten up, watch your tone!
So what if you feel alone?
They can’t do this on their own.
You’d better hurry up and answer your phone!
Smarten up and watch your tone!
Don’t let your precious cover get blown!
Forget that the pain has hit you like a cyclone!
Don’t get knocked off your controlled throne!
Stay safe in your controlled zone!
Hold on tight to your stone!
They can’t do this on their own.
Smarten up, watch your tone!
You’d better hurry up and answer your phone!
Stand up and be their safety zone.
Forget that your mind is a combat zone!
Keep your feelings unknown.
They can’t do this on their own.
Smarten up, watch your tone!
Do not put all your hope in a single wishbone!!
Wake up and see your not alone.
You can’t do this on your own.
Go ahead and let them hear your moan.
Stop worrying about your tone!
Go ahead and answer your phone.

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Posted by on July 6, 2015 in Poetry


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Dear Jeffery: April.13

Hi Jeffery! So I was thinking about you today, once again….I say that as if a day or even minute goes by that I don’t think about you. I don’t feel consumed by anger today. Just sad and lost. It is so hard to see the pain in mom and dads faces. Just by looking at them you can tell they are thinking about you. There is a sadness that glazes over their eyes. It is heart breaking Jeffery! I don’t know how to help them. I can’t even help myself! Whatever anyways….this is something I wrote. I don’t know if it’s for you or for me. It just is I guess. As you know I won the dummy award, it was doing that, that got me to write this so I can’t really complain about the pain. It was a nice but all to brief break from my emotional pain though. So from physical pain to emotion pain here it is.

Broken hand
Broken heart
Now I know not where to start

Once I walked protected
Now I walk alone
Imprisoned by tears and fears

David is gone
While Goliath stands on
Towering over me
Taking me
Breaking me
Right now he has his stake in me

I can hear David
Hear his voice
Telling me to stand
To fight
It’s what’s right

I cry
I can’t
I wont
Please don’t

My ears are plugged
Plugged with pain and hate
I am to weak to fight
I can’t bare your sling and stone
They are to mighty for my shaking hands

Broken hand
Broken heart
I know not where to start

Starting over
Turning over
David’s pain is finally over

So there it is. I don’t know where to go from here. Where do I start? Like really though? I just don’t know. I am sick and tired of crying and feeling this black hole of pain. It sucks! There is no better way of putting it, that is without using very colorful language. I listen to your voice in your songs and it just make me miss you more, and yet I can’t stop listening. It’s all I have in this physical world of you to hold onto. It makes me want to hear you call just to say you love me. I treasured those calls and texts! It seemed we were so connected. If I was having a bad day it was like you just knew. Those are the times you’d just send a “I love you” or “I miss you”, even when you had no idea how my day was going. Just sitting here writing about it makes me cry. When will the tears stop? The pain? I am over it! I feel like I don’t have the strength to do this. To deal with it. I keep praying for strength. Praying that God will take this pain from not only me but everyone. You have no idea the impact you made in this world! You are getting shout outs everywhere! I’d love to know what you think of dads tattoos! They are for you! He misses you so much Jeffery! Come to him and let him know you are ok! His heart is broken in two. He needs to know you are ok and with the Lord. Mama too!  We called the medical examiner to see if we could get any answers yet and still nothing! I don’t know……..I love you, I miss you. We all love you and we all miss you. You know they are dedicating an entire show to you? Pretty awesome huh? I am actually going! I may hide in the back out of fear……..but I will be there! OK I can’t stop crying again so I shall stop writing for now. I love you and miss you more than you could know!

Love always


Posted by on April 13, 2015 in Letters to Jeffery, Poetry


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