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Here we go again!

So begins the adventure with my stomach once again. For those who don’t know. I have severe endometriosis, have had it since I was 13. I have had three surgery’s to try to clean out as much as they can and finally three years ago I had a partial hysterectomy. Leaving behind just my ovaries. Within a week of the hysterectomy I had complications and have been having them since. After many emergency room visits and 28 months on a waiting list I finally seen my surgeon again yesterday. It appears that there is a new complication, one we hadn’t expected. So on March.10 this year I will go under the knife once again, this time to have my left ovary removed. I am praying that this will be the last time. Though if all these years have taught me anything it is to not expect this to be the last. I am putting my faith in God, that He will give me relief from this pain. Even if it’s only for a while. Something is better than nothing. It is so easy to get frustrated and upset when things seem to continually go wrong. To get angry even at times. But I need to remember that while the bad does outshine the good quite often there is still good. Good things can and do happen. Regardless of how minor they seem. That is my plan. To stay focused on the good, on the positive things that are happening and can come from all of this. I don’t know His plan. What I do know is if I waste my time being miserable and feeling sorry for myself I may miss a great opportunity. Whether it be for me or to help someone who is suffering as I have and am. Over the years I have learned that sometimes God puts people in your life when you least expect it, in unlikely places and for reasons you wouldn’t expect. So fight on I will and see where this ride takes me once again. I don’t ask for pity or sympathy, just encouragement and prayers. Also on a side note I am trying to get back into the swing of writing regularly again, but we shall see what adventure each day brings. Until next time God bless you and have an amazing God filled evening!

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Posted by on January 19, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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I am over this!

I am so upset and frustrated!!!! I don’t understand why God would dangle healing in front of me just to pull the rug out from under me. I know He isn’t the one doing it, I just don’t understand it. I had a partial hysterectomy (everything but the ovaries) in September 2013. I thought I got my life back, I thought I was healed, I thought the pain was gone forever, I thought I’d never have to see narcotics again, I thought I’d never see birth control again. Of course, I thought wrong, on all accounts! That just goes to figure! This is just how my life goes, something good happens then poof! Everything unravels. This is so incredibly frustrating! The pain started well over a month ago. I got maybe 6 months, maybe, without pain after the surgery. We were hoping it was just my appendix, I know it sounds silly to hope for that, but the alternative (endometriosis) is far worse than a quick surgery and that’s it, no more pain. Now I am faced with who knows how long of pretty bad pain and stupid blankety blank pain pills. Which means my mind will be clouded so I won’t be able to write anything good. I know God has a plan for me I just wish I knew what it was or even to know that the pain will end soon, and not when I am dead. There is no light at the end if this miserable dark tunnel right now. I don’t even know. I am trying so hard to see any glimmer of hope in this, but I am coming up short. I am not trying to be depressing or grumpy I just needed to vent. Please pray that The Lord sees fit to lay His healing hand upon my body and mind. I don’t like being angry with Him. He has blessed me and everyone around me so much but it’s hard to see right now through the pain and anger. On a higher note I can go back to work today, only for a couple of hours and with the cane….but at least I can do something other than sitting around feeling sorry for myself. The pain and grumpyness is why I have been away for the last week sorry 😦 . God bless you and have a God filled day!

 
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Posted by on May 7, 2014 in Blog's

 

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